I have a thing about colors...

I remember when I was growing up and my clothes were pretty... basic.  I never really had my own style.  Well, my style was whatever mom could afford or fit me from hand-me-downs.  I usually didn't think much of it.  I was just grateful for clothes to wear... I remember having one pair of jeans that I'd wear all week long and pray that none of my classmates noticed.  There were some times that I would need or want to wear a certain thing and wouldn't have it.  For example, my friends would say, "Lets all wear red tomorrow." But, I didn't have a red shirt.  Or, they'd say, "We're all wearing our boots tomorrow."  But, I didn't always have a pair of boots to wear.

I was perfectly content with what I had until I was somehow reminded of what I didn't have.

Today, I took a look at the last few selfies I posted and found myself so overwhelmingly grateful for the ability to actually have my own style.  I have a thing about animal print and colors... I love colors.  I even have my closet color coordinated because I own such a wide variety of colorful clothes.  But, for a season of my life, my closet was filled with clothes that we're fancy or colorful or cute.  Then the Lord sent an angel to me who took me shopping clothes for me all throughout high school... whatever I needed and wanted, she made sure I had.  It was nothing short of a miracle.

Until I became of age and was working enough to be able to start getting things for myself, the Lord really provided!  And would you believe that He is still providing today?  There are still people now who see something, think of me, and buy it...

And I always remember the days that I didn't have nice things...  I am so grateful.

No matter where you find yourself in this, just thank God for where you're headed. Better days are coming.  How you start doesn't have to be how you finish.  The same God that provided for me then will definitely keep providing for me!

Scriptures to meditate on:

"Do not despise these small beginnings, for the Lord rejoices to see the work begin..." -Zechariah 4:10

"Your Father knows what you need before you ask Him..." -Matthew 6:8

"He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus..." Philippians 1:6

Prayer:

"Lord, thank you for where I started and the ability to look back and see just far how you have brought me.  Thank you for your faithfulness.  And for loving me enough to provide for me even when I didn't know to ask!  When I look at where I want to be and realize that I'm not there yet, don't allow me to be in despair.  Remind me that you're still faithful and you're not finished with me.  In Jesus name, Amen."

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It's your SPRING!

     In Columbia, South Carolina last week was filled with significant amounts of rain and thunderstorms.  There were two days last week where many public schools canceled all afternoon activities and dismissed school early.  For some, including myself, it seemed to be a bit an overreaction to a stormy forecast.  There were tornado watches and warnings in effect, but that's what tornado drills are for in school, right?  For others, it seemed to be the perfect response to avoid a potentially dangerous situation.

     I had to pick my new cat up from the vet's office after my lunch break and when I was dropping her back off at home, I began to understand why many districts chose to send children home and some jobs sent their employees home...  The wind was terrible.  There was rain and hail falling from the sky in buckets.  I was praying to God that I would make it back to work safely.  But, I saw just how bad the storm was.

     On my way back to the office, my bosses were trying to reach me to tell me to stay at home, but I was closer to work than I was to home.  I made it safely and watched the storm pass from the comfort of my office building...

     Since the beginning of April, it just seems like we've gotten significantly more rain.  Then I remembered that popular phase "April showers bring May flowers! and the Lord laid some things in my spirit that I wanted to share.

1) Seasons change! Rain and storms occur when hot air and cold air come together.  Spring is the season between winter and summer.  Rain is normal in this particular season because of the change that is taking place in the atmosphere.  Maybe you're experiencing some storms in your life. But, it's okay.  It has a purpose.  God is changing things from bad to better.  From alright to awesome.  From so-so to supernatural!!!  The storm in your finances.  The storm in your marriage.  The storm of depression.  The storm of insecurity.  The storm of unsuccessful.  The storm of disappointment.  The storm of bad health.  The storm of confusion.  The storm will so bee over.  The sun is going to come out and things are going to be alright and the storms you're facing are proof that the atmosphere is changing.  Proverbs 30:5 says, "For His anger is but for a moment, His favor is for a lifetime; Weeping may last for the night, But a shout of joy comes in the morning."

2)  Your flowers need watering!  Marvin Sapp has a song called Place of Worship that I absolutely love.  Here are some of the lyrics:  "Go find your place of worship. Look into your pain and find your praise.  Every low place in your life prepared you for your high place and every tear you cried was water for the garden of your victory..."  The storms are coming because the rain that falls are providing nourishment for the flowers of success, flowers of faith, trees of prosperity, and grasslands of peace in your life.  Those tears you've been crying have been to provide water for the garden of your victory.

3)  The sun will shine!  I am so glad that trouble don't last always.  April showers won't last forever.  I'm not saying that there won't be any summer storms.  Because every season of life has it's own set of storms... But I am saying that overall we can expect the severest April showers to bring us beautiful May flowers.  It will be over soon.  It will be alright.  Those stormy days won't last forever.  And you'll look back and say that it was truly worth it!

God bless you!

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Fishbowl Faith

I recently moved into a new apartment.  I'm super excited about it because it's closer to my job, close to my mom's job, close to the law school, I've got it nice and cozy and although everything isn't exactly unpacked, I know that I already love my new home.  As I was in the process of moving, I knew that I wanted to buy a fish.  I have had a few goldfish in my life, but I wanted something a little different.  Something 'easy' but beautiful.  At the pet store my heart was set on this betta fish.  It is burgundy, blue, and black.  It's very responsive and when his tail spreads, it is a beautiful site.

I spent almost an hour looking at about 25 different betta fish, but this one was the one I wanted.  I had already bought the rocks the day before and I wanted to buy him a new bowl to go in at home. I knew where I would put the bowl and how I wanted it to look. So, last night after I got the bowl all set up and put him on my night table, I just watched him embrace his new environment.  And the Lord spoke to me so clearly...

1) I thought about this fish long before I found it, like God thought about us long before we were created.

"Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, And before you were born I consecrated you; I have appointed you a prophet to the nations." - Jeremiah 1:5

I know a few people who were born after years and years of their parents trying to conceive.  I also know friends who were a complete surprise to their parents.  I know some people have been referred to as accidents.  But, you were not an accident to God.  He was very intentional when He made you, he knew you before your mother knew your father, he formed you before you mother knew she had conceived.  You were consecrated, separated, set apart, and given an assignment by God.  Time is not a factor to God.  So whether you were early, late, or unexpected to MAN, rest assured that God did everything in His perfect timing.

2) I chose this fish, like God chose us.

"You did not choose Me but I chose you, and appointed you that you would go and bear fruit, and that your fruit would remain, so that whatever you ask of the Father in My name He may give to you." - John 15:16

Jesus tells the disciples then and us now that we didn't choose Him, but He chose us.  That may seem insignificant to you, but I know what it's like to NOT get chosen.  I've been the last one picked for the team.  I've been the rebound.  I've been the last choice.  I've been the one that nobody really wanted.  I know that feeling of rejection and loneliness.  I also know that what people say is not important because our Father in heaven chose me and appointed me for a specific assignment and purpose.

3)  I purchased this fish, like Jesus purchased us.

"And they sang a new song, saying, "Worthy are You to take the book and to break its seals; for You were slain, and purchased for God with Your blood men from every tribe and tongue and people and nation." -Revelation 5:9

My fish was not very costly.  But, I was.  Can you believe that Jesus purchased us for God?  He was perfect.  He knew no sin.  He loved us so much that He laid down his life so that we could live in Him and live for Him.  He was the perfect sacrifice.  Only He was able to bridge the gap made by sin between us and God.  Jesus' blood bought men from every tribe and nation.  We take pride in the things that we work hard to obtain just like Jesus takes pride in having us as His own.

4) I prepared a place for this fish, like Jesus has a place prepared for us.

"If I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you to Myself, that where I am, there you may be also." - John 14:3

Jesus came to earth for the sole purpose of dying on the cross for our sins and being raised from the dead so that He could return to Heaven.  He said in His word that He was going to prepare a place for us AND He's coming back to get us one day to take us to that place.  If you feel misplaced, that's why.  If you're constantly searching for home, that's why.  Earth is not your home.  This world and the things of this world will temporarily satisfy an eternal longing for heaven.

5) It is my pleasure to watch this fish thrive, like it is God's pleasure to watch us thrive.

Do you have children?  Have you ever sat and watched your child sleep?  or play?  or laugh?  Doesn't it just do something to you to see them happy and healthy and whole?   When you labor over the preparation of a meal, don't you love it when someone compliments it, enjoys it and appreciates it?  If an earthly parent does, how much more do you think our heavenly parent does?

When we find ourselves in God, get joy from His word, find rest in Him, love on Him and embrace His love, God is pleased.  He takes pleasure when His children are successful and joyful.  No, that doesn't mean life will be easy, but its a reminder that God truly does want what is best for us.

This may sound silly, but it's what I'll forever call FISHBOWL FAITH!!!

God, thank you for using a simple fish to blow my mind.  You love me so much that you planned for me, you chose me, you purchased me, you prepared a place for me and you take pleasure in my wellbeing.  Thank you for loving me.  Help me to always thrive in the spaces you have created for me to be a part of: every job, every school, every church.  Let my life be a pleasure to you.  In Jesus' name, Amen.

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Obedience is Better: #nofear

Life is full of choices that we must make and opportunities that we will be offered.  For some that sounds exciting and for others, stressful.  Maybe you have always made the right choices and never had second thoughts. OR maybe you and I are alike in that sometimes having too many options feels overwhelming and can bring on a fear of making the wrong decisions and fear of the unknown.  

I believe that very thing (fear) is what often keeps us from being obedient to what God has instructed us to do.  Of course fear isn't the only thing...  But, that's what I'm going to focus on today. :-p

There's greatness on the other side of your fear.  Every person who was ever great had to first face their fears...

Oprah had to face her fear of rejection before auditioning for a movie role.  Michael Jordan had to face his fear of failure before become a basketball star.  Soldiers must face their fear of dying before committing to serve on the battle field.  DO NOT LET FEAR STOP YOU OR SLOW YOU DOWN!

There are three types of fear:  (1) protecting,  (2) paralyzing, and, (3) reverencing.  

This first kind of fear can protect you from doing things that you feel could be dangerous or harmful.  This feeling may keep someone from getting on roller coasters because they don't want to fall.  This feeling may keep parents from allowing their child to go a certain place.  Or it may keep a single woman on the defense against anyone who tries to change her routine.  This feeling may keep a man from opening up to the woman who wants to know him in a deeper way. This feeling may keep a toddler from walking for fear of falling.  

But, that fear can easily become paralyzing if unmanaged or unreasonable.  If you never allow your children out of your sight, you may stunt their growth.  If you as a single woman never open your mind or heart, who will be able to capture it?  Sir, if you never open up to that woman how can you ever become her knight in shining armor?  If a toddler remains afraid of falling, then he'll be crawling into adulthood.   Imagine a world full of adults that never learned how to walk, crawling everywhere, asking others to pick them up when they're tired of crawling.  Nonsense.

A reverential fear, though, is what we should all have.  I love and respect my spiritual father.  He's been like a dad to me since I started high school in 2007.  I want to make him proud in every aspect of my life.  I take his advice, no matter how harsh, to heart.  Growing up, I avoided a lot of situations (not all) because I knew my daddy would not approve.  That's the type of fear we should have with our Heavenly Father.  A reverential fear of God moves you to listen when He speaks.  It causes you to seek His face and seek His counsel and advice.  It makes you consider His opinion before decision making.  Lastly, it leads you to seek His validation.  And if you have that, there's nothing more you need to move forward in your life. 

Delayed obedience--for whatever reason--is still disobedience.  

Scripture says quite a few things about fear:  

"For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind."   -2 Timothy 1:7 

"For ye have not received the spirit of bondage again to fear; but ye have received the Spirit of adoption, whereby we cry, Abba, Father."   -Romans 8:15

Obedience to God is better than bondage to fear.  Imagine all that God has in store for you if you would just move when He says move.  You'll never get to Step B without completing Step A.  If you are afraid, please know that God hasn't given you that fear.  So let's cast it back to the pits of hell!  Write that book.  Start that business.  Go on that trip.  Start that ministry.  Do what God has given instructions for you to do!  The enemy wants you to stay where you are.  The devil is constantly trying to destroy you, your future, and your destiny... Don't let him!  Everything you want is on the other side of your fear. But, more importantly, everything God wants for you is on the other side of that fear!  

I overcame my fear of failure and rejection by stepping out on faith... Over the past week, I've done a couple cool things:     (1) I have continued writing my first book which I haven't worked on in a couple months.  That book is entitled "The Consignment Christian" which is specifically geared to encourage the heart of young women everywhere who struggle in the areas of faith and identity. And (2) I started my YouTube Channel!  So check it out!    If I can overcome MY fears, you can overcome yours!  Keep me in your prayers.

Lord, help us today to not be controlled by fear when it is time to do what you've called us to do.  Let us be fully convinced that the time is now to do that thing.  Thank you for power, love, and a sound mind.  Thank you for making us your own.  Because we have your approval and validation we can run full speed into all you've called us to.  In Jesus name, Amen.

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